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Sometimes it is so hard to decipher between leading, guiding, or correcting our children and exasperating them. Then there are so many times that we as parents can be exasperated by our children as well. When we are feeling this way, how are we to keep from taking our frustrations at being a parent out on them? How do we keep from exasperating our kids?
This is so hard. Believe me, I know how hard this is.
We whine, we complain, we may even yell to and at our kids, and while we know this isn’t effective, we are at the end of our rope and desperate for something to change in our children.
So, what do we do?
I’ve been a parent long enough to know that if we are looking for changed behavior in our kids it needs to start with us. If we are wanting to change how we respond to our children, we first need to recognize our unhealthy habits and then replace them with healthy ones.
However, nothing is very effective in being a parent if we are exhausted and frustrated while we are exasperating our kids. Let’s start with identifying what we can be doing that may not be the best for our kids.
Watch for these 15 things parents do exasperate their kids.
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- Comparing your children to one another, to children outside your family, or to fictional characters
- Showing favoritism between your children
- Talking down to your children
- Being an overprotective parent, especially when it comes to keeping them from experiencing the negative realities of life
- Being demanding rather than understanding
- Making assumptions about their intentions
- Being neglectful or abusive in any way, physically or emotionally
- Speaking harshly
- Using sarcasm
- Failing to listen to their thoughts and feelings
- Forcing your child to walk the path you want them to walk rather than giving them the freedom to make their own way
- Being unjustly critical
- Parenting all your children the same way. Each child is unique and therefore needs to be parented a bit differently from their siblings
- Offering your love only conditionally
- Imposing unrealistic expectations on them
Parenting isn’t easy, and it certainly isn’t for the faint of heart. It challenges us like nothing else, yet we all want to do what is best for our children.
What can we do instead?
One of the best things I do as a parent is to learn from others. Likewise, I love to share what I’ve learned with others.
Perhaps one of the best investments I’ve made in my life as a parent is being part of an amazing program called Positive Parenting Solutions. This program is created by best selling author Amy McCready. Her best selling book, seen below, is amazing. Click on it for more details.
These 15 things that we can do to exasperate our kids are something that I have grown to recognize over time, and replacing them with realistic, positive behaviors is taking this post to the next level. This course has helped me do that.
This course has been life changing for me in my life as a parent since it has shown me what not to do while showing me what I can do to be a better parent, which includes not exasperating my kids in addition to countless other things that were negatively impacting my relationships with my kids.
Amy has been featured all over the place indulging on the Today Show, Rachael Ray, Fox & Friends, and more. You can find out how to really transform your parenting as I did by clicking on the graphic below. It’s an investment, but it has been one that I was so glad I made years ago.