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Mommy overwhelm. Mommy stress. If you’ve got kids, I’m guessing you know just what I mean. Things are going along fine. Then, the next thing you know, you’re pushed right over the edge. But, did you know that there are certain triggers that are common among moms that send us right into the mom burnout phase?
I’ve been getting to know moms through this blog and all over social media for over two years now. I have surveyed them, I have interacted with them, and I have read their emails. After all of this and because I am a mom to 8, I can say that these five things are in the majority of things that cause moms stress.
The thing is, once you know what they are, you can recognize that they are coming. When you experience one of these five things, you can take a few deep breaths, give yourself an extra dose of grace, and maybe grab some chocolate.
Wondering what these five things are?
Here are the five triggers of mommy overwhelm.
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1. The comparison trap
What is the comparison trap? You’ve probably heard this term before, but if you haven’t, here it is in a nutshell.
You’ve fallen into the comparison trap if you find yourself comparing yourself to other moms who look like they have it all together when you don’t. Does this sound like something you’ve done before?
If you have, no worries. We are all guilty of this from time to time. After all, we’re only human. But, that’s not an excuse.
Rather than focusing on finding faults in ourselves by comparing ourselves to others, we need to focus on what makes us great moms to our kids and what makes us important to them. Trust me, there are a lot of things in that category.
2. Lack of a clear and consistent daily schedule
Do you have a consistent daily schedule?
Many moms can see this as an “extra,” and as something that isn’t really all that necessary. This is especially something that moms who stay at home can end up thinking. Actually, I felt this way for years as well.
However, as I’ve come to discover, making and sticking to a daily schedule is so needed – especially if you are staying at home most of the time.
The good news is this is not as hard as it sounds. Actually, I cover this in greater detail in my free email challenge. You can click on the link below and join in.
Once you get yours established in creating and using your daily schedule, I promise you will see the difference.
3. Lack of “me time”
Ok, now don’t bail on me. I know the last thing that we have time for in our busy days is me time. But it’s so so important!
Me time doesn’t have to be a lot. You can get the time you need with only 10 or 15 minutes. You might spend this time in your room by yourself where you could read a good book, listen to some music, or do some organizing. The key is to spend thins time doing whatever it is that relaxes you.
The simple act of doing this means that you’ve given yourself a break from all the chaos of everyday life.
Try it for a day and you’ll be amazed at the change in your attitude and the outcome of your day.
4. Trying to parent all your kids the same
Think about this. Do you do things the exact same way as your best friends, or your sisters, or your neighbors do? I’m guessing not. The truth is, no one person handles things the exact same way as anyone else! This also means that that since every person does things slightly differently, everyone needs different things.
Why then would it be fair to expect that what works for one of your kids is going to work for all of them? They all are different. Every single one of my kids is completely different. What works for one may not work for the other. And, trying to parent using the one-size-fits-all method leads right to exasperation for all involved parties.
For instance, my oldest likes the freedom to plan her own days the way she wants (something we butt heads over sometimes, though not as much as we used to).
Yet my next child works the best with a steady routine that I put into place for him. And all of my other kids prefer something that varies from these patterns in some way.
As moms, we need to find what works for each kid and then roll with it!
5. Not giving yourself grace
There is a a difference between grace and excuses. But, more times than not, we as moms are so hard on ourselves. Knowing these trigger points will be a great help to you. That way when you can diagnose the reason for your “mom moment,” you will know to give yourself some grace rather than a verbal tongue lashing.
Mommy overwhelm something we all want to avoid because in those moments, we are no good to anyone.
Get to know these five most common triggers for a mommy meltdown. Then, if you see one of these appearing in your life, you can put these tips into practice.
And, don’t forget the chocolate!