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How to Create the Quiet Time All Moms Need

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Do you have a quiet time in your family? When your child is little you have nap time, but don’t all moms love just a bit of alone time? Nap time is when we as moms have our alone time. It is time where we can do what we want, or it is time when we can do what needs to be done without interruption. Quiet time is a lifeline for moms.

Just because our kids outgrow nap time doesn’t mean that we need to give up our alone time, which I hear nearly all moms speak about. All moms express alone time as not just a want, but as a need in their lives. In our house, we call this quiet time.

Once we talk about what quiet time is, we will move on and talk about how you can create the quiet time you need!

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What is quiet time? 

  • Quiet time is a time when all kids (and moms) have time on their own. For kids it is time in their room. If they share rooms as in our large family, it is time in a certain designated room that they have all to themselves. This, of course, is different from time when you might send your fighting children to different areas to separate them. This is planned time apart for a designated time and a designated time in the day, ideally.

What are the benefits of quiet time?

  • Quiet time feeds our souls as moms, but in our children quiet time teaches contentment, creativity, and obedience through abiding by the parameters set up within quiet time.
  • When children learn to entertain themselves during quiet time, they are more easily able to entertain themselves at other times, too, such as during church, concerts and other activities, or when their parents are having dinner guests over.
  • When siblings play apart at times, they learn to appreciate one another more, which means they play together better. Playing on their own teaches them to value having a playmate.
  • Having quiet time further establishes routine, which provides children with a sense of normalcy.

How much time is appropriate?

It depends on the age of your child.

  • I spoke of blanket training in Blanket Training For Independent Children, which starts as soon as they can sit up. I have found 20 minutes or so to be sufficient here.
  • By the time they are one, your child should be able to have quiet time (which is separate from nap time) for about 30-40 minutes. The purpose here is in training your child to play on their own. They need to be able to entertain themselves so that when nap time gives way to quiet time somewhere around three or four, they already know just what to do.
  • After 18 months or so, time can increase as you see fit. Your child should be accustomed to the routine of quiet time by now so they can adapt to longer times. Generally, my three year olds can have quiet time for an hour or more. 
  • As preschoolers, their quiet time often serves as their individual school time with CD’s, busy bags, and activities as I spoke of in Homeschooling: A Series Part One and Homeschooling: A Series Part Two.

How do you implement quiet time?

  • Assess your needs as a mom, the ages and needs of your child or children, and the needs of your day.
  • Write out your expectations for your children, and explain them to the point of your child or children understanding.
  • Expect a few bumps in the road at first, but continue to stand firm in your expectations. Before you know it, things will be running smoothly.

In hearing the concerns of other moms, I know that we all crave a few moments of peace in our day. If nap time is no longer an option, so often moms just sacrifice their alone time. However, quiet time can meet that need and is something that benefits our kids as much as it does us. It is a way that we can still have those moments of peace and respite that our souls need. At the same time, our children learn valuable skills that will serve them well.

If you don’t have a daily quiet time, here are the tools you need to create one – without guilt!

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  1. Jennifer,

    Love the idea for quiet time outside of naptime. It actually makes sense to me to do it that way. I have four kids ages 5, 4, 3, and 1 and we live in a small 1400 sq ft, 3 bed/2 bath house. The oldest three share a room, and my 3 year old is a wild little girl. The thought of trying to start this training in the midst of all that I have going on (housework, work – I am an online instructor, and homeschooling) is very overwhelming. But I know that I NEED this, like you said. Do you have any tips for how I could start this and implement it into our daily routine, seeing that I’m starting this with FOUR little ones?

    1. Yes! I actually just did a 4 part video training that covers this and more. It’s free. Just go here to watch it>>>https://theintentionalmom.lpages.co/refocus-live/

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