Why I’m Not Talking About Josh Duggar

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Wanna know why I’m not talking about Josh Duggar? I can’t, that’s why.

In case you missed it, Josh Duggar was found to have been cheating on his wife when the information from the Ashley Madison website was leaked since he had not one, but two accounts there, it sounds like.

While everyone is busy discussing this man, I can’t talk about Josh Duggar because I can’t stop thinking about his wife, Anna Duggar. I’m not thinking about Anna in a “poor, helpless Anna” sort of way, but in an “I can’t even imagine what she must be going through” sort of way.

In almost everything else about her life, I can in some way imagine what her life is like.

I know what it’s like to have four young children who were all born close together and who are all dependent on me for their daily care.

I know what it is like to give birth four times and to look in the mirror at yourself shortly after birth each time wondering if your body will ever even get close to “back to normal.” Somehow each of the seven times I’ve given birth I look in the mirror shortly after to see a reflection that looks basically the same as it did before the baby was born…swollen belly, engorged breasts, and skin that resembles that of a teenager again with all the extra hormones.

I know what it feels like to look at that reflection staring back at you with milk leaking all over the place, hair a disheveled mess, and bags under your sleep deprived eyes and wonder whether your husband will ever find you even remotely attractive again.

What I can’t imagine, however, is Anna having to look at her four week postpartum body and wonder about all the women that her husband has been secretly lusting after or actually living out the unthinkable with while she was carrying his fourth child and caring for his other three, too. Or while she was carrying any of his other children, for that matter.

What must she be thinking? What must she be feeling? How can she ever feel like her feet will be back under her?

In his statement, Josh asks the public to pray for his wife. I can’t do anything but that, and I hope you don’t think less of me when I say I just can’t bring myself to pray for him yet.

I have a feeling that Josh’s life will turn into a redemption story, simply because he is in the public eye already and whether he does have a story of redemption or not, I would imagine that this is the story that will be painted.

So while he climbs back out of the doghouse of public judgement that he finds himself in now, Anna is left having to decide if she wants to stay married to this (I’m purposely leaving adjectives out) man who so selfishly ripped her heart out and stomped on it, or whether she wants to try to make it on her own with the four children she shares with this man.

I cannot imagine the weight of that decision.

I can’t talk about Josh Duggar because I don’t think he even deserves to be talked about. I do, however, agree with him that Anna needs everyone’s prayers.

I’m not here to judge this man, that’s just not my deal. However, my heart just breaks for Anna and their four children, all of whom are innocent casualties in this whole mess.

I encourage you to think of these five innocent victims and to pray that Anna would have the wisdom she needs to do what is best for her and her four children.

And Josh…I guess I’ll just let everyone else keep talking about him.