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The Secret to Connecting Your Family

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I’ve talked about how important a reboot is. A reboot really is the secret to productivity in any given day. However, closely related is a reset, and it is a bit different. If a reboot is the secret to productivity, then a reset is the secret to preserving your sanity and connecting your family.

What do I mean?

Life can really give us a beating, can’t it. You, me, and everyone around us can really be dealt a bad hand at times.

We have obstacles to overcome, burdens to bear whether our own or the burdens of others, we have way more to accomplish than we can ever come close to getting done, and we rarely have the resources we need to get any of these things done with ease.

The days can wear us right down. We are weathered. We are worn. We can even be torn right open, but we have to keep right on kicking.


It has a way of sucking the life right out of us.


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I’m exhausted just thinking about all this stuff. I’m exhausted just thinking about how often I find myself in all that stuff I talked about right there.

I have written about filling your tank and similarly filling your jar. These things are so very important, and we need to be vigilant in doing these things on a regular basis.

But then there is a reset, and this is vitally important as well, and took be more than 40 years to really embrace a reset…and to make it a priority.

In fact, it was just within the past year that I discovered that the time and resources I put into a reset are completely and 100% worth it.

I am a driven, busy, active, and overly committing type of person who used to think that good enough is good enough.

Yep. I used to think that. I used to think that for years and years. And, I thought that good enough was all I needed.


I actually did something that wasn’t good enough but it was exactly what I wanted.

I lived in those moments. I savored them. Each and every one of them.

And I shared them with my family. In doing so, I discovered that this reset was actually the secret to preserving my sanity, and the best way to connect as a family.

As we spent the evening at the beach, I squished the sand between my toes, I let the waves wash up my legs and loved that they got the bottoms of my shorts all wet. I breathed in the fresh clean air and let it fill me all the way down into my toes. I closed my eyes and just let my heart sing.


Even better? I watched my kids laugh and run together, I watched them splash around in the waves and do cartwheels in the sand, I saw my kids all engaging with one another.

Of course all good things must come to an end, and we left for home.

As I went through the week that followed, I kept going back to the beach in my mind. It was as though I could feel it, smell it, and love it all over again. I could hear the laughter, feel the smiles, and “see” the love again in my mind.

When things got a bit hairy in my day as the week went on, I closed my eyes and pictured myself there. When I felt tired, overwhelmed, frustrated, and so many other things, I relived the beach.

The following weekend, we did the same exact thing. Only this time, I noticed that from the moment I stepped out of the car I felt so light and free. I felt like I could breathe again.

As we walked the pier I was talking to the friend who introduced me to this wonderful place, sharing how I felt. Interestingly, she said she felt the same way.

And it was then that I knew that it’s the reset that is the secret to preserving your sanity since it wasn’t just me who felt this way.

Maybe for you it’s not the beach that will be your reset. Maybe it will be a park, a night out on the town, or dinner at your favorite family hangout, but you, me, your kids…we all need a reset.

Here’s what makes it so amazing to experience as a family and how it completely connects you:

It is something to look forward to

As my day or my week unravels before my eyes, I know that I have this to look forward to.

It is guaranteed family time

We really do all love it in our family, and we all really enjoy spending time together.

No matter how busy life is, it is a priority 

I will warn you, this takes discipline, but if you are serious about preserving your sanity, your reset simply must be priority numero uno.

No matter how people have been fighting prior to leaving, it all melts away

I would love it if it were rainbows and sunshine in our house all the time, but it’s not. Reality is, people do fight. Siblings do fight, and as spouses my husband and I can disagree at times. But, when we are having our reset time, all is forgotten. It’s magic.

It is a reason to say no

Sometimes it can be so hard to say no, but most times all invitations that come during our reset time get an automatic no. It may seem cold, but in an effort to preserve our reset, there is next to nothing that we allow to interfere. It is nice to have an automatic no that I don’t have to feel guilty about.

Our kids love it as much as their parents do

So often, especially with teens, things can get the eye-roll when the kids have to give up things they’d rather be doing for family time. In our experience, this just doesn’t happen with the reset. Anytime the kids and parents love the same thing, it’s a win in my book!

If you are running around feeling like you’re always chasing after something, only to find yourself empty-handed and out of breath, you need a little sanity restoration. Your reset can restore your sanity like nothing else can, and the best part is you can share it with your family.

intentional living

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